This does not affect my aptitude as a parent

* Before you start reading this post, I must disclaim – I am not a redneck.  I enjoy a variety of cultural entertainment, such as the theatre, which I attend at least once or twice a year.  I am a huge Josh Groban fan and even went to his concert.  He’s not redneck, right?  I’ve been to the Salvador Dali museum twice.  I don’t own any mustard-stained wife-beaters.  I don’t even own any track suits.  I have all my own teeth.  (Well, I do have crowns on my front teeth, but that was totally by choice, not as a result of a bar fight.)  I don’t watch WWE or NASCAR or American Gladiators.

** Not that someone who possesses these qualities is necessarily a redneck.  Just know that I am not.  Really.  Quit smirking.

*** Not that there’s anything wrong with being a redneck.  I, for one, was born in a hamlet scattered with all brands of redneck and most of them are very lovely people.

***

This may come as a bit of a shock to those who don’t know me or who only know me a wee bit.  Brace yourself.

My family, everyone, my parents, siblings, their significant others, Anonymous Husband and I, are big fans.  Of what, you ask?  Well, let me tell you, it’s not the opera.

We arrange our lives around monthly Pay-Per-View UFC; Ultimate Fighting Championship, to the uninformed.  UFC is the major leagues of mixed martial arts.  It is mainly boxing, Greco-Roman wrestling, and jiu-jitsu, with occasionally another discipline thrown in the mix.  It is highly skilled, competitive fighting.  In the most un-WWE way possible.  It is all real and totally un-choreographed.

We lurve it.  We talk about how “fired up” we are about an upcoming match ad nauseum.  We debate the fight cards pre-event.  In fact, AH practically bought our fancy-schmancy television in anticipation of PPV going HD with the UFC (that is so fun to say).

Now, I’m not a violent person IRL(in real life).  Movies with violence only really appeal to me if they have historic significance or if the violence contributes to the story line and is not gratuitous.  But when it comes to UFC, I am completely desensitized.  The more action, the better the fight.  Let’s just say, no UFC bout was decided on a smile and a handshake.

AH and I host these PPV events, mainly because Eirinn is asleep when they start.  It’s just easier.  Plus then we don’t have to shift our arses off the couch.  We have treats and snacks and appetizers and make a whole big deal out of the night.

There is the Grand Daddy of All UFC Events coming up this Saturday.  We’ve been looking forward to it since it was initially announced.  I’ll spare you the details, but I will say that the main event is a title match between this really big jerky jerk-head jerk and unarguably the most talented Canadian fighter in the league.  Plus?  It will be the first time an event is held in Canada.  We have strict rules for fighting in Canada, especially in Ontario (something about all fighters must be amateur and UFC fighters are professional), but Quebec is more lenient. 

Needless to say, we are tres fired up.  I’ll let you know how it goes, whether you’re interested or not.

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One thought on “This does not affect my aptitude as a parent

  1. WOOO!!! I’m super-psyched!! glad to see everyone down there is too!! lol
    I’ll be there Saturday with bells on…and nachos (in hand, not on, lol)

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