How to make a treasure map

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Step One – Google “treasure map”. 

Step Two – Steal the first one that doesn’t suck.

Step Three – Print it.

Step Four – White Out any copyrights or source credits.

Step Five – Photocopy it so people can’t see the white out.

Step Six – With a black felt tip pen, trace over the clean, Adobe Illustrator lines to make it look hand-drawn.

Step Seven – Colour it in with pencil crayons.  Those found at work within your office supply cabinet work best.

Step Eight – Crinkle it up for authenticity.  Go ahead and scrunch it into a ball.  Careful un-scrunching it or you’ll have to start again at Step One.

Step Nine – Tea stain it by soaking it in a sink filled with last night’s left over tea.  “I’m making a treasure map” is a good excuse to not have to clean up after your evening tea the night before.  I “make treasure maps” five or six times a week.

Step Ten – Let it dry on a cooling rack over night.

Step Eleven – In the morning, go on and laminate that sucker because it’ll look way too good to be disposable.  I used Avery Self-Adhesive Laminating Sheets.  Mine were about 15 years old and stolen from my dad’s home office, but I’m sure new ones will do the trick.

Step Twelve – Don’t let any kids touch it.  They’ll either wreck it or lose it.  Let them ruin the original from Steps One to Four.

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5 thoughts on “How to make a treasure map

    • This was as a present-topper for the pirate party on Saturday. Tempting as it was, I was joking about not giving it to a kid. But, yes, I do have too much time on my hands – the whole thing took about 2 hours (not including drying time).

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  2. Pingback: Planning Jargon » Caught Mapping (1940)

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