The evil of the thriller


After three failed Halloween attempts by Eirinn (first, too young, second, wouldn’t wear a costume AT ALL, third, wouldn’t wear a costume for more than three houses), by George, she’s got it.  Finally.  And, thankfully, Avery was all over this Halloween deal like a fat kid on candy, where FAT KID equals Avery and CANDY equals CANDY!!!

Avery lead the charge at the beginning, doing all her own stunts walking.  She robbed all willing homeowners of their candy and chocolate and chips,pillaging the next house shouting “MOOOORE, PLEEEEEE” all the way.  However, she’s not a real pirate, she just plays one on Halloween. 

She ended the night as the only child in the neighbourhood screaming like a mental patient because she wanted to walk and be carried and ride in the wagon and don’t touch her but why aren’t you touching her and YARRRRGH, but really?  Does that surprise anyone?

DSC_0285Eirinn was Dorothy, complete with Toto in a basket and her ruby red slippers, made by Mommy.  She had 15 layers of clothing and was still frozen to her very essence.  She went to as many houses as her treat bag would allow, trudging through the throngs of children with a determination like a fat kid getting candy, where FAT KID equals Eirinn and CANDY equals CANDY!!!

She did so well; they both did.  I asked Eirinn at the end of the night, after their bags were filled to overflowing and their pajamas were on in place of their costumes, what she thought about Halloween.  She told me it’s good.  She told me she didn’t like it before, but now she does, and is it going to be Halloween again tomorrow?


I hate carving pumpkins.  Strike that.  I dislike carving pumpkins.  I ABHOR the vile act of removing pumpkin guts.  The cold, clammy, chunky, snot-like goo you have to scoop out makes me want to vomit.  Vomit, eat it, and vomit again, just to prove how much it makes me want to vomit.  It makes me want to vomit my own vomit twice over.


If it were up to me (and, come to think of it, why isn’t it up to me?) we’d have plastic plug-in pumpkins.  No mess.  No vomit-inducing snot goo.  But every year we get at least two pumpkins to carve.  And, somehow, every year I get that God forsaken gunk on my hands.  Vomit.

This year we originally had two pumpkins, but the morning of we discovered that one of our pumpkins was rotten.  Oh, perfect!  Now the snot goo is infiltrating the protective shell!  So I ran out and replaced the one bad pumpkin with two good pumpkins, bringing our grand total of pumpkins to be carved to three.  Blech.

DSC_0303In a combined effort, AH gutted them, I stole found the designs off The Interwebs, transferred them onto the empty pumpkin shells, he carved two and I carved one (begrudgingly).  Mine was Scully.  Whatever.  It was good enough.  If teenagers don’t smash him in the middle of the night, the garbage truck will on Tuesday.

AH did Hootie and BATS!, but it was totally my idea to take the carved-out bat and stick him on top.  I think that’s what makes the pumpkin special.  And isn’t Hootie the cutest?  He can stay.  Until he starts to rot and attract rats.  Then he can go.




These kids were two houses down. 


Ghetto blaster on 10, video camera rolling, Thriller filling the neighbourhood with AWESOMENESS.  They did the whole routine without missing a beat.  When they came around trick or treating about an hour later, they were like local celebrities.  Kind of makes up for every other day when they’re running amok and swearing in front of my kids.



3 thoughts on “The evil of the thriller

  1. First of all, your kids are absolutely adorable in those costumes! I mean I could just eat them up (and their candy!). Second of all, your pumpkins rock and third of all, I wish I could have seen the MJ tribute!

    • Thanks! And thanks! It was pretty cool, especially given that the kids doing it ARE the neighbourhood trouble makers (nothing awful – just loud and tend to congregate). It was kind of refreshing to see them do something on halloween other than smash pumpkins.

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