Firstly, see that ridiculously cute little girl over there on the sidebar with the sparkly pink Santa hat? Click that picture and vote for her. Don’t be a jerk.
Remember way back in the olden days of Wednesday when I was talking about those chocolate bars that are super bad for you and super gall-bladder-attack-inducing which, naturally, equals super delicious and GIMME MORE?
Yeah. Those. Well, I have more! I have 6 more, to be exact, which means I have 2 prizes of 3 chocolate bars, or maybe 3 prizes of 2 chocolate bars. I haven’t decided. It will all depend on how many people enter to win.
And you should definitely enter. These are amaaaaaazing.
Oh, yes, my friends. I’m not just going to give these away for free. Well, technically they will be free in that they will cost you no money. But you will have to pay in comment-currency. Basically I’m buying your friendship. I’m not ashamed to admit it. You wanty chocolate? You likey me.
Except I don’t want to take a blood oath of friendship, because I’m not cutting myself to make it official. And I don’t want one half of a Best Friends heart shaped pendant (but if you had one that needed splitting, I want BeFri, not StEnds).
Just leave a comment and I’ll Random Number Generator the winner on Monday. It’s that easy. Comment = chocolate + my eternal friendship. Or just chocolate, if you’re some big jerk.
And the beauty of this contest is that I bought the chocolate bars with my own cash money, so I can make up the rules myself. And they are as follows:
a) Comments are to be of the “make-me-laugh” variety. I don’t care the subject, just be funny – a snarky remark, a knock-knock joke, your favourite hilarious movie quote, whatever. But don’t feel too much pressure; remember this is a random draw, I’m not judging your funny. Oh, and don’t be a jerk.
b) Canadians AND Americans are welcome to join in. Everyone else is out of luck. These are chocolate bars, people. I’m not paying more in shipping than they’re worth. Sorry.
c) Only enter if you think you might like the prize. If you don’t like almonds or caramel or chocolate or *gasp* sweet treats, please let someone win who does. I can not stress enough how amaaaaaazing these are.
d) If you happen to win and you do have a gall bladder attack or a cholesterol-induced stroke or exploding diarrhea, I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE. I have warned you, several times, that these chocolate bars are not made from whole wheat and carrots and flax seed. They are made from sugar and saturated fats and deliciousness.
e) And, again, because this is my contest, I say that family and friends can enter. I’ll be using that Random Number Generator thing anyway, so it’s not cheating.
Summary of Rules:
If you want chocolate and aren’t on some sort of medically supervised diet, comment. Funny Canucks and ‘Muricans only. Don’t complain to me afterwards if you’re some sort of jerk.
Winners announced on Monday. Good luck!