Lost

 

Where, oh where did my Woody doll go?

Where, oh where can he be?

I suspect Mr. Evil Dr. Porkchop and his dastardly cohorts, Rex and Mr. Potato Head have kidnapped him and are keeping him tied up in a secret underground lair of evil-doing.  I just can’t seem to FIND Mr. Evil Dr. Porkchop’s Secret Underground Lair of Evil-Doing.  We have searched this house high and low, in every toy box and laundry basket, every cupboard and drawer, under every couch, chair and bed.  We have scoured the cars and the basement.  We’ve interrogated both sets of grandparents.  No one will confess to housing Mr. Evil Dr. Porkchop’s Secret Underground Lair of Evil-Doing and they CERTAINLY won’t admit to aiding and abetting the kidnapping and forcible confinement of Woody.

Woody has been missing for at least one week.  That’s a week without food, water or love.  We’re desperate to find him and bring him back home to his kid, Avery.

“Now Woody, he’s been my pal for as long as I can remember. He’s brave, like a cowboy should be. And kind, and smart. But the thing that makes Woody special, is he’ll never give up on you… ever. He’ll be there for you, no matter what.”

The least we can do is be there for Woody.  We’ll not stop searching for our brave cowboy until he’s found and returned safely.

Stay strong, Woody.  We’ll find you.  Someday.

***

Y’all have NO IDEA how traumatizing this has been for me.

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8 thoughts on “Lost

    • I’m more upset about it than she is. If the 4yo lost her Jesse, there would be no stone left unturned, but the 2yo is very meh? about the whole thing, which I find horrifying.

  1. and no one sent a ransom note? that’s thoroughly odd. perhaps Woody got lost? have you filed a missing person’s report? maybe we could put up some posters.

    or…have you seen Bo Peep lately? could be she and Woody ran off together. just sayin’.

  2. OMFG. OMFG. I DO know how traumatizing this is. We lost “Enno” the 30 year old raggedy ann doll that Eleanore can’t go A N Y W H E R E without last month. My aunt made it for me when i was five. Ugliest ever.

    TOTAL devastation until my sister agreed to mail hers to Eleanore. Thank God I had the matching sock that I had made shorts for old Enno out of. I whipped up a new pair and we told her Enno went away to get fixed. By some miracle, it worked.

    I hope you find it. I know how deeply important these things are. Would she accept a new one if you drove over it a few times?

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