Please shower. Your natural aroma is undesirable, as evidenced by my singed nose hairs. Some water, a little soap, even, and call me crazy here, a touch of deodorant, and you’ll be grand. Can you not smell yourself? Have you become desensitized to your overall stench? IS GOD THAT CRUEL? You stink. I hate to be the one to have to tell you this, but it’s a problem that affects not just you, but everyone around you. We’re here because we care and/or because we have to be, so, please, do us a solid and take control of your situation before it gets out of hand. Well, it’s mostly out of hand already, but who knows what will happen if this continues. The cloud that currently surrounds you is expanding and it’s invading my personal space bubble. I don’t take kindly to anyone or any…thing invading my personal space bubble.
So I say this with as much kindness as I can muster for a person choking to death on your thick, hot, sour body air – take to your tub and scrub that shit right. Use shampoo and A LOT of industrial strength grease cleaner. And don’t be shy with the soap. It is your friend and it loves you.